Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Jon & Kate Plus Waiting for Kids

I watch "Jon & Kate Plus 8." Insert eye roll here.

I consider myself the childless version of Kate: A bossy perfectionist who likes to get her own way. But lately I'm feeling a little more sympathy for Jon.

I'm 27. When Jon was my age he was saddled -- I mean, blessed -- with 8 kids, including 6 infants. By comparison, I'm not ready for even one. Seems like maybe he wasn't either.

I suppose it's only natural that more and more of my friends have traded Dos Equis for dos kiddies. At my high school reunion this month, two classmates were pregnant and several more had one, two, three, even four kids. And earlier that day, a younger cousin announced that she and her husband are expecting.

All the best to them. In fact, I'm a little jealous that they seem to know exactly what they want, because I have no idea.

I know fewer people in New York with kids. If my own observations and the New York Times' wedding announcements are any guide, it does seem like people here wait longer. But I also suspect that I just don't frequent the same places as families. After all, I met most of my Ohio friends -- including those who now have kids -- when we were all single.

Besides, raising a kid in the city just seems plain hard. The last thing I want to do is lug a Hummer of a stroller down two flights of stairs just to catch the train. And forget about living in a third-floor walk-up. Then there's the washer/dryer situation-- or rather the lack of them in most apartments here. All in all, it's not something I want to do.

Truth be told, it's not something I'd want right now even if I were in Ohio. I love my young nephews and cousins. I think they're funny and charming and smart. But I'm impatient, uncertain and quick-tempered.

And I don't even like our two cats.

Until that changes, if that changes, I can watch Jon & Kate to remind me time and again why I don't have kids. But I might not be watching for long.

More than the eight kids' "zany antics," I'm getting tired of the blatant product placement. Could they squeeze in any more "Crooked House" references into Monday's episode? Even the kids were wearing Crooked House shirts for part of the show. And really, what do the Ace of Cakes, Emeril Lagasse and Orange County Choppers have to do with the struggles of a large family? And that's just this season.

As a side note, imagine how happy the Crooked House marketing department must have been to ride on the coattails of the Jon & Kate divorce announcement and the likely record-breaking audience. Crooked House: Such an unfortunately appropriate sponsor for the episode.


  1. I can't imagine having even one kid, let alone eight, and in multiples! Of course, it's no secret that Phil and I don't want kids, so it annoys the piss out of me when friends who DO want them are like, "Oh, you'll change your mind." Um .... I'm about to turn 29 (which I think is how old Kate was when she had the sextuplets? Never seen the show, but I know everything about it thanks to the near-constant coverage!) I'm far from old, but I'm not that young either. If I had an INKLING of a maternal instinct, it would have reared its head by now. Not everyone is meant to have kids!

    I do, however, want to be an aunt, so hopefully my sisters don't feel the same way I do. :)

  2. You and Jannette are just about my only two friends now that don't have kids, and Jannette and I are both two years older than you. I waver and occasionally want a baby, but I still have more stuff I want to do first, mainly a lot of traveling that's too expensive and difficult to do with kids. But I had someone not very long ago tell me that I was getting old for having kids!

  3. Well, I hope you don't base your desire or non-desire to have kids on Jon & Kate. That just ain't normal! I think just about anyone would go insane in that kind of environment. And children do eventually stop peeing on the floor. I totally agree though about the show. I used to love it, but I am so fed up with it now. It is just ridiculous how obvious they are about the product placement and cross-ties with the other TLC shows. It is no longer about 8 adorable kids. You are right about how ironic it is that they chose to pair their divorce announcement with the crooked house segment. How fitting.

  4. Excellent post Diane!! I knew we were related for a reason;). I too have been known to watch little Jon and Kate every now and again, it is the stupid marathons that always hook me in.

  5. I agree with Becky that human beings were not meant to have litters. It's not like it was 400 years ago where you needed 10 kids to work as farm laborers and half the infants didn't make it to childhood.

    Crooked house indeed.



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