I watch "Jon & Kate Plus 8." Insert eye roll here.
I consider myself the childless version of Kate: A bossy perfectionist who likes to get her own way. But lately I'm feeling a little more sympathy for Jon.
I'm 27. When Jon was my age he was saddled -- I mean, blessed -- with 8 kids, including 6 infants. By comparison, I'm not ready for even one. Seems like maybe he wasn't either.
I suppose it's only natural that more and more of my friends have traded Dos Equis for dos kiddies. At my high school reunion this month, two classmates were pregnant and several more had one, two, three, even four kids. And earlier that day, a younger cousin announced that she and her husband are expecting.
All the best to them. In fact, I'm a little jealous that they seem to know exactly what they want, because I have no idea.
I know fewer people in New York with kids. If my own observations and the New York Times' wedding announcements are any guide, it does seem like people here wait longer. But I also suspect that I just don't frequent the same places as families. After all, I met most of my Ohio friends -- including those who now have kids -- when we were all single.
Besides, raising a kid in the city just seems plain hard. The last thing I want to do is lug a Hummer of a stroller down two flights of stairs just to catch the train. And forget about living in a third-floor walk-up. Then there's the washer/dryer situation-- or rather the lack of them in most apartments here. All in all, it's not something I want to do.
Truth be told, it's not something I'd want right now even if I were in Ohio. I love my young nephews and cousins. I think they're funny and charming and smart. But I'm impatient, uncertain and quick-tempered.
And I don't even like our two cats.
Until that changes, if that changes, I can watch Jon & Kate to remind me time and again why I don't have kids. But I might not be watching for long.
More than the eight kids' "zany antics," I'm getting tired of the blatant product placement. Could they squeeze in any more "Crooked House" references into Monday's episode? Even the kids were wearing Crooked House shirts for part of the show. And really, what do the Ace of Cakes, Emeril Lagasse and Orange County Choppers have to do with the struggles of a large family? And that's just this season.
As a side note, imagine how happy the Crooked House marketing department must have been to ride on the coattails of the Jon & Kate divorce announcement and the likely record-breaking audience. Crooked House: Such an unfortunately appropriate sponsor for the episode.