Growing Kids

I seem to be surrounded by babies, even if the word is one of the worse insults in my own house.

Two friends had babies in recent weeks. At least three more friends are due in the next three months. Meanwhile, there are no babies in my own house -- much to my own relief.

Atticus, who turns three in less than a month, finds it to be the worst affront if one of uscalls him a baby. He is a big boy, he proclaims. And truthfully, he is -- or at least very nearly so. On Sunday he switched from a rear-facing car seat to his first front-facing one. It was quite momentous, for me if not for him. This is the first time the entire family has faced forward since the day we brought Edith home from the hospital more than five years ago.

Slowly all of the baby gear has left our house. Maybe the first to go, when Atticus truly could still be called a baby, was the swing. Then went baby toys, baby clothes, sippy cups. Just last week I passed on our pack and plays. We still have the crib, but even that's long been converted into a toddler bed.

I like seeing these new little babies. So small, so cute! But I'm happy to have growing kids who can now do things for themselves ... and a full night of sleep.

How Atticus Came into the World

Atticus's day of birth was infinitely smoother than Edith's rough-and-tumble birth more than two years earlier. I never could have guessed that birth itself could be so easy. (The recovery, however, ...)

Three ultrasounds in a row indicated that my amniotic fluid levels were borderline-low, so I was scheduled for an induction. Although I knew this was for the safety of the baby, I wasn't happy with this outcome. For one, I was scared that it could lead to a c-section.

Less rationally, I didn't like having a date set for Atticus's birthday. That meant I would know every "last" ahead of time -- the last time I would take Edith to the library as an only child, our last day alone together and all the rest.

I had some contractions the Monday night before the Thursday induction, but they went away after a few hours. I didn't get much sleep the next few nights.

But on April 2, Paul and I arrived at the hospital shortly before 7 a.m. to get the party started. I was hooked up to a couple of monitors, and an IV was inserted into my arm to give me pitocin, designed to jumpstart labor. (They never even had time to hook me to the monitors with Edith!)

The contractions weren't too bad, and Paul and I chatted until the nurse suggested around noon that I get an epidural if I wanted one. They wanted to break my water soon, and I would be more comfortable with the epidural, even if I wasn't in much pain at the moment. Although I was nervous about getting an epidural, I knew FOR SURE that I didn't want a repeat of natural childbirth. The epidural was painless, my doctor broke my water at 12:30 p.m., and we waited.

Things progressed nicely. Around 3 p.m., my nurse said the baby would be born within the hour. Not long after, she told me she'd check on me around 3:45 p.m. I told her that I was feeling some pressure, so she decided to check me right then. The verdict? It was time.

After 20 minutes of pushing, Atticus was here.

Paul took a week of paternity leave last week, and I don't think I even touched our laptop. Although things are more chaotic (and my blog posts may not be as regular for a while), I will be publishing photos and posts about how things are going. But mostly I will be enjoying our growing family.

Welcome, Atticus!

Introducing Atticus Richey Erwin, born Thursday, April 2!

Time: 3:45 p.m.
Weight: 8 pounds 12 ounces
Length: 21 inches

I was induced Thursday morning due to low amniotic fluid, and we couldn't be happier to meet our little guy six days before my due date!

Who's Ready for a Baby?

As I sit here considering whether or not Edith is ready to be a big sister, I'm realizing that she might be the most ready out of all of us.

Paul and I? Well, we have the house set up -- baby's bed, swing, changing station, all that stuff is ready to go. But mentally ... hmm. As I overheard Paul once say, we might be less ready this time around. With Edith, we felt ready only because we didn't know what we were getting into. Now we know exactly what we're getting into and how hard it can be.

But Edith? She's just excited to have a baby in the house. She's excited to go to the doctor's office (that and the hospital are synonymous for her). And while I'm sure there will be a period of adjustment for her, I think in the end she'll do just fine. Plus, she's a pretty heavy sleeper at night, so at least one of us will be nice and refreshed in the morning!

In any case, ready or not, here he comes.

Nesting for New Baby

Nesting is real, and with about three weeks til D(elivery)-Day, it's in full swing.

We bought a new couch last week. We set up the baby swing and pack-n-play a few days ago. The car seat is installed. When I last looked in the closet, I had 17 rolls of paper towels.

Next up: cleaning our bedroom, filing papers and packing my hospital bag. And who knows what I'll think up next. In the weeks before Edith, I was washing a hallway wall with a mop after a leak from the upstairs apartment caused barely noticeable streaks.

It's hard to believe that in all likelihood, this baby will be here in less than a month. And yet with all the cleaning, laundry and preparation, we're bound to forget something.

With Edith, it was buying a travel-size container of wipes. I went to her first pediatrician appointment with a full container in the diaper bag. Two years later, I now know that a few wipes in a resealable plastic bag would have been just fine!

What have we forgotten that we will learn all over again? What will this baby teach us that we never knew before? We'll find out soon.

Starting Over with Baby

Just as things are getting so much easier with Edith, it's about to get a whole lot harder in the household.

Baby boy is scheduled to arrive in just a tad more than six weeks. His welcome coincides with Edith seemingly growing in leaps and bounds. I'm not just talking height and weight. More importantly, she's growing in understanding.

She can often choose the books she wants to read by title. She helps unload the dishwasher and set the table for supper. When she's especially tired at nap time or bedtime, she'll tell me she's sleepy. She has preferences and ideas.

Contrast that with what we'll be up against again in April. A tiny newborn who depends on us to decipher his screams for food, sleep and amusement. No walking, no crawling, not even any burping without some help.

Of course, basic infant needs are obvious, as are the differences between a newborn and a two-year-old girl. But it's been so easy (or comparatively so) the last few months compared to Edith's early days.

Those days will come again, I know. But while I'm excited to meet our new addition, I'm nervous that I've gotten too used to the ease of Edith.

Big Sisters

Saturday marked a special day in my opinion, but no one else's. That's the day Edith turned two years, two months and three days old -- the exact same age I was when my younger sister was born.

It's hard to believe that in a few short weeks, Edith will be in the same position I was back then. Chances are, the long-term effect of having a sibling while only a young toddler herself will be largely the same: She won't remember ever being an only child.

I've never asked my parents how I handled the change. I should. I never heard any stories of me trying to shove a pillow in Katie's face when she came home from the hospital, so I must have done OK. I think Edith will, too. Right now she's fascinated by babies in infant car seats, and I have to make sure she isn't all over their hands and faces. But I think it's a good sign that she thinks babies are pretty adorable.

Of course, seeing a baby for a few minutes at story time or open gym is a whole different ball game than having an infant brother at home full-time. But all things considered, I'm more worried about how I will adapt to the changes than how she will!

2/3 to Baby

I'm about 2/3 of the way to baby, and I had forgotten how literally painful this final stretch can be. Two weeks of back problems left me literally limping up the stairs. Luckily, that mostly disappeared a few days ago, but I still yearn for the days when I can sleep on my back. Or sleep soundly at all. No sleep now is practice for baby later, they say. Blah, blah, blah. I'll take the sleep now.

But I do remember what it was like around this time with Edith -- the subway rides, the much slowed down walking, when walking was one of my major forms of transportation. And I still smile to think about how Paul had to do ALL of the laundry for weeks (really months) on end because I simply couldn't carry all of the baskets and bags to the Laundromat downstairs. I'm sure he doesn't miss those days.

So is this pregnancy better or worse? Eh, it's different. It's easier because I have more flexibility, by having a car, living in a comparatively large house instead of a small apartment and by being a stay-at-home mom. But it's also harder because I'm constantly chasing a toddler. So I think it's a wash.

Hungry All of the Time

I now eat approximately seven times a day.

I am hungry all of the time. You would think it would be fun to eat whatever, whenever you want. And the only time you can do that without judgement is when you're pregnant. (Not that it's ever stopped me before.)

But it's not fun. I'm always eating or thinking about eating. My meals/snacks go something like this:

• Breakfast (cereal and orange juice)
• Second breakfast (usually a Toaster Strudel)
• Lunch
• Snack #1 (toffee ice cream bar)
• Snack #2 (currently chips and salsa)
• Supper
• Bedtime snack (nowadays, milk and cookies)

 And if I skip any of those, chances are I'll feel yucky and won't want to eat anything. It's tiring.

At least I have the Christmas smorgasbords to look forward to. I'll be taking advantage.

Why Infant Clothing Infuriates Me

With a boy on the way in April, I have to shop for an almost entirely new baby wardrobe. I have a few gender-neutral outfits from Edith's infant days, but not many. Now that I've shopped for both a boy and a girl, I can easily understand why.

If a piece of clothing was made for a girl, it can rarely be worn by a boy (at least not without a few stares). That's because most girl baby clothing tends to fall into a few motifs:

• Pink
• Flowers
• Ballerina
• Cats

And by clothing, I mean almost anything that touches any part of their body: onesies, sleep-and-plays, shirts, pants, socks, shoes, pajamas, whatever. Now that I'm shopping for pull-ups, I've even noticed that those are decorated for gender. Why pee-catchers are boy- or girl-specific, I'll never know.

Boy clothing, on the other hand, features:

• Monsters
• Dinosaurs
• Cars and trucks
• Camouflage
• Airplanes
• Space themes

For some reason, it's easier for a girl to wear boy's clothing. I got Edith a pair of monster-themed pj pants long before I knew we were having a boy. Why can only boys like monsters? And can only boys dream about becoming an astronaut? It's infuriating.

Luckily we thought ahead and purchased our large baby items (stroller, car seat, swing, bedding, etc.) in neutral greens, grays, blacks. But don't get me started about gender-specific toys! Our son has quite a few pink blocks in his future.

Boy Oh Boy!

The big gender reveal was Friday -- we're adding a baby boy to our family in April!

It came as a shock, and it still is. I knew in my head that the chances were 50/50 either way, but in all honesty I'd only ever really thought about girl names. I guess I thought that since I already grew one girl, that's all I could manage.

Obviously that's not the case, as the ultrasound revealed. I'll admit that I'm nervous. I feel like I have the girl thing down. Boys are a whole new animal. I never had brothers -- although ironically I have three nephews and no nieces. Adding kiddo number 2 will be an adventure in more ways than one.

Pregnancy #1 vs. #2

I feel like I'm pretty cognizant of the fact that no one cares about my pregnancy as much as Paul and me. Our parents and siblings care, of course, and maybe a few other various family and friends, but no one cares to the extent that they need daily updates (like I'm often guilty of giving Paul).

I'm even more aware of that fact this second time around, because even I don't pay as much attention to this pregnancy as I did the first. I have only so much worry and attention to go around, and most of that is concentrated on the toddler in front of me. I consider that a good thing -- I'm not so focused on how uncomfortable, hungry, etc. I am.

But obviously I'm aware of how these two pregnancies stack up against each other, mostly regarding food. The first trimester morning sickness phase lasted about six weeks with each of them and consisted of constant, all-day nausea. But with Edith, I ate a lot of baked potatoes, applesauce and ice cream milkshakes. This time it was Jolly Ranchers, Starburst and loaf bread.

In both cases, my appetite came back in spades during the second trimester. But this time I've hung onto some aversions. Pizza. I couldn't get enough of it right after I found out I was pregnant, then I got sick on it and can't eat it very often now. Tomato sauce and pasta (although I did have lasagna during vacation!). Most of all, yogurt, which I ate a lot of with Edith.

Cravings this time: Ice cream, Cheese Bits (a generic Cheez-It -- can't stand the real things!), croissants, toffee bars.

And what I think might be the weirdest one of all -- ice-cold water. For my entire life I've been just fine with room temperature water straight from the tap, usually preferring it. Now the water needs two or three ice cubes.

But all in all, I feel fine. I'll be 20 weeks along next week: halfway done.

New Baby on the Way!

This blog has been silent for a few weeks, but there was a good reason. There's a new baby on the way in April! The bad news: it came with the all-day, non-stop "morning" sickness that Edith also brought with her. So while I wasn't writing blog posts, chances are I was hunched over the toilet (or felt like I was about to at any moment).

But I'm well into the second trimester now, and that has mostly gone by the wayside. Though not completely. I still have hours of yuckiness, but I'm generally back to my old routine.

My new routine, however, probably won't include three blog posts per week. I'm going to start posting them as the urge to write arises, and as time permits. Put together a toddler, a kid on the way and a busy freelancing schedule, and it doesn't leave a lot of room for much else.

Still, I hope to share the ups and downs of life as I long have-- for about seven years now!

Strollers in Ohio vs. New York

Edith's first stroller ride, four days old.

Edith was four days old when she had her first stroller ride. It was by far the fastest and easiest way to get to her pediatrician's office.

My nephew Wyatt, on the other hand, was three months old when he first rode in a stroller.

The difference? In New York, a good stroller is one of your most used pieces of baby equipment. But for Ohio babies -- like Wyatt, and now Edith -- a stroller is convenient but not quite so important.

In New York, there were a few times when I would take Edith out in my Ergo baby carrier without a stroller, such as if we went to the Laundromat. But more often, I would lug the stroller up and down the apartment steps.

In Ohio, it's more common to take baby from house to car to destination, all without the use of a stroller. In part, that's because Edith is a little older. For example, we can place her in a grocery cart and leave the stroller behind. But even when we visited Paul's mom over the weekend, we didn't bring the stroller. No need.

Our stroller will, however, get more use here in Columbus than in other, more rural parts of the state. We can still walk places in our neighborhood. We took Edith in the stroller to a nearby farmer's market on Saturday, and we walked to a restaurant for lunch the next day. We took a stroller ride to the library last week, and I expect to get some stroller action on the nearby trail and park sometime soon.

I still could never do without a stroller. But I'm not going to be putting the same mileage on it here.

Pretty in Pink, or Any Color

Sleepy baby.

When Paul and I found out our baby was to be a girl, we swore to each other that we would largely avoid pink.

But now, as Edith turns seven months old on Friday, I can say that is a promise we have largely broken.

Is it our fault she looks so darn cute in pink? But really, that's not even the reason she wears so many "girly" colors.

For one thing, we forgot about gifts. People love buying little girls pink outfits. Who can blame them when they're so adorable? And, in fact, one of my favorite outfits she wore as a newborn was emblazoned with pink strawberries -- and I bought that myself.

But I've also learned another reason why pink outfits are so convenient. One I didn't anticipate. Baby's outfit is largely the only thing strangers have to go on to determine whether said baby is a boy or a girl.

Tights say GIRL!

Honestly, people seem to have trouble with this 50/50 question quite frequently, no matter what she's wearing. Once I was asked when she was sporting pink camouflage pants. Really? Another time she was wearing a blue outfit adorned all over with pink flowers. REALLY?

So forget about it if she's wearing anything even slightly unisex. Yellow, white, red: They all beg the question.

I'm not offended when people ask. Her pediatrician even got it wrong during one visit! Truthfully, I've made the same mistake with at least one other baby. When they're this young, there's nothing that makes them look like a boy or a girl except their clothes and accessories. And don't think you're going to see Edith with her ears pierced anytime soon.

A Guide to Using Your Baby as a Party Prop

Babies are inconvenient. Except when they aren't.

As expected, having an infant excludes you from many activities. Late nights in bars are out. Fancy restaurants are out. Broadway shows are out.

But the secret truth is that a baby is always a good excuse to excuse yourself from anything for any reason. If you don't want to go to that party or get-together, there's always baby's early bedtime or mama's multiple nighttime wake-up calls to point to as a reason to decline.

Mostly these are real "excuses." But as Edith gets older, we're finding which rules and routines we can stretch. Just last Friday we stayed at a neighborhood barbecue until nearly midnight -- Edith slept on me in the baby carrier for a couple of hours and in the stroller on the way home. It would have been easy to stay home on account of her bedtime, but we experimented. Now we know it can be done.

If you decide not to use your infant as an excuse to stay home, baby comes with another perk: She's an instant conversation starter. People you've never met before will ask about all her vital stats. A baby is the ultimate small-talk conversation starter. And bonus: If everyone is otherwise occupied, I can always talk to Edith. As someone who tends to feel awkward around new people, this is a pretty big perk.

I don't recommend having a baby purely for these reasons, but there's no denying it: A baby is the ultimate party prop.

5 Things Birthing Classes Should Teach But Don't

I get that nominally, at least, birthing classes should be about -- duh -- birth. But in addition to practicing all of those breathing exercises, ours at least did review a few post-birth items. In addition to the (in)famous video of a birth, we did put a diaper on a doll, for example.

But now that it's been more than five months since Edith was born, I can look back with confidence on five things I wish I would have known that would've made the early days, weeks and months much easier.

1. Parenting Books Aren't Always Right.

They can't be, because they contradict each other. And I should know. I've read plenty.

Do this, not that. Do that, not this. And whatever you do, don't even think about whatever you were planning to do until a second ago.

Don't get me wrong -- the books are useful. No matter how well-meaning friends and family are, there are new thoughts and ideas that I would at least like to consider.

On the other hand, there are few things more useful than advice from those who have come before. Just don't get upset if I don't always use your advice. Admit it -- when you were a new parent, you didn't use it all either.

Each parenting book is usually good for a few gold nuggets, or at least something to think over. And while most of my reading came before Edith was born, I'm still borrowing parenting books periodically from the library. In fact, I recently pointed out to Paul the irony in my reading a book called "Simplicity Parenting."

2. Clothing Sizes Can Be Waaaaaaaaaay Off.

Just like with adult clothing, the same size can be vastly different according to the brand. But even sizes within the same brand can vary! Edith got two 6-9 month onesies as gifts -- same brand -- and she had already outgrown one and could just fit into another when I tried them on her at about 4 months old.

And not only that, but the sizes themselves are wonky. Some are labelled with a range: 0-3 months, 3-6 months, etc. Others just say, for example, 3 months or 6 months. Often the tag will give a weight and height range, but they are of little use when you have a daughter who's of average weight but in the 99th percentile in height.

3. Changing a Diaper Isn't Intuitive.

So much so that I wrote a whole blog post about what new parents should know about changing diapers.

Even five months into this whole parenting thing, I'm still not that fast at changing diapers. But at least I can do it now without mentally checking off each step.

4. Stocking Up Is Useless (and Probably a Waste of Money).

Yes, buying diapers in bulk makes them individually cheaper, but it's a waste of time and money when those diapers get too small, cause blowouts that you're constantly washing from onesies and need to be replaced with the next size up stat.

By diaper size 2 I'd finally learned my lesson. Buy in mega-bulk only in the beginning, when baby's not on the border of a new size.

Pre-buying many (if any) baby clothes is also ill-advised. Especially newborn outfits. Edith received some she didn't even wear.

You don't know how fast your baby will grow or what season it will be when he or she reaches any one certain size. Best to buy outfits as you need them, if you need them. With baby shower gifts, postpartum presents and doting grandparents, I've purchased very few clothes.

Besides, in a pinch she can generally wear the next size up if all the best-fitting clothes are dirty before laundry day.

5. There's Rarely One Right Way for Anything.

Every parent seems to swear by something. Something that will surely help baby sleep. Something you should definitely give baby to eat. Something that you absolutely, positively don't want to be without.

I'll swear by something, too. But I'll try to keep it to myself unless you ask.

Because if I've learned anything in five months, it's this: No one's right and everyone's right. And me too.

Out and About for Food and Drinks

On Friday I had my first beer in 14 months.

I'm not and never was a heavy drinker. Even in my roaring (?) 20s, it was a crazy night if I had more than two pints. But I have to admit that beer Friday night tasted good.

It was a reunion of sorts with several of my former coworkers, at a bar near my old office. Making my work commute was strange, but it was even stranger to again be in a bar and able to order whatever I wanted.

Paul stayed home with Edith, something he's always willing to do. What made the outing possible without a headache, however, is that Edith is now often sleeping through the night. That means she needs only a 3- or 4- ounce bottle before going to sleep, and I'm home for the next feeding (in this case, 6 a.m. Saturday morning). My late night followed by my early wake-up call meant a late morning nap. A small price to pay.

(A side note for those who are wondering: It's perfectly fine to have a drink or two while breastfeeding. Even our pediatrician said so! Women seem to follow one of several "rules," such as waiting an hour or two per drink after the last feed to feed again. Many say that if you're fine to drive, you're fine to feed.)

The beautiful spring weather that night literally put a spring into my step. And even better, the thermometer stayed in the high 60s all weekend. Paul, Edith and I took a long walk around the neighborhood Saturday afternoon and went into Manhattan on Sunday.

During that Manhattan trip, I also marked another milestone: Eating in a restaurant with Edith in my lap. I know that doesn't sound very exciting, but if you only knew the number of restaurants that now opens up to us!

The story is this: We normally go only to restaurants that can fit a stroller at the table. But Paul and I both felt like conveyor-belt sushi, which meant a trip to East Japanese. The restaurant layout doesn't allow for strollers next to the booths or bar-type stools, or at least not easily. So Edith spent the meal on my lap, and I spent the meal keeping her fingers out of my soy sauce!

But surprisingly, sushi was a great choice since it's a meal you eat one-handed -- much easier than say, a hamburger. With one hand around Edith and one hand on my chopsticks, we had a perfectly wonderful meal.

Making Space for Baby in New York

Edith, trying out her high chair

Kids take up space. And space is the one thing most New Yorkers just don't have.

I mean, we can't fit a stand mixer into our kitchen. How can we fit all the accoutrements of a child?

Because of Edith, we've added several large pieces of furniture to our apartment: a rocker-recliner, baby swing, pack 'n' play, dresser and high chair being the biggest. We also have a folding table set up full time in the nursery, since neither our bathroom nor our kitchen is large enough to fit the baby bathtub.

Surprisingly, we haven't had to get rid of anything to make room. We have, however, made some decisions based on space -- no ExerSaucer for this kid since we don't have the floor space now or room to store it later -- but we've been able to fit more than I ever would have imagined due to efficient rearranging.

For example, it's now impossible to be a wallflower in our apartment because there are no empty walls to stand against. But I don't feel overly cramped.

I can see space becoming more of an issue as Edith gets older. Her toys take up little more than a milk crate (by design) right now. No Barbie Dreamhouse allowed while we live here! And all toys must absolutely be put away each night if I don't want to trip on my way to putting her to bed from the rocker in the living room.

Hard to believe such a small thing comes with such big accessories. Good thing she isn't clamoring for a closet yet.

Bonus: Check out one neighborhood mom's tongue-in-cheek space-saving solutions for a New York City kid's bedroom.

What All New Parents Should Know About Changing Diapers

Edith visiting her dad at work.

Changing diapers is literally the crappiest part about being the parent of an infant.

But a few tips when Edith was first born would've made the process cleaner, faster and cheaper.

It's nice and all when parents-to-be learn about breathing exercises or what latest gizmos are out there to soothe a fussy child, but what us newbies really need to know from day one is how to change a diaper.

Why didn't anyone tell me ...

... diaper ruffles go on the outside.

We had no idea. When Edith was a newborn, I just left the ruffles around the legs however they happened to be when I put the diaper on her: inside, outside or some combination. I'm sure we had more leaks than necessary as a result.

... if you start getting lots of leaks and blowouts, it's time to go up a size.

I thought I was putting the diapers on wrong -- either too tight or too loose, I wasn't sure. After all, she was well within the weight limits of the diapers we had. And on that note, ...

... diaper weight limits don't mean much.

Edith tends to start the next size up when she's about a pound short of the minimum recommended weight -- and she's a long and lean baby.

... expensive diapers don't always mean better.

We started out using Pampers Swaddlers -- I'd heard of them, and that's what we got in the hospital. But they're expensive. But all diapers are fairly expensive, and it's difficult to try lots of brands without spending a fortune. (On that note, a neighborhood friend started a business, Miny Moe, which will ship you samples of several types of diapers to give them all a shot -- great idea!) On the other hand, it's worth a few extra dollars if they consistently contain the poop.

We decided to take a chance and try the Diapers.com brand. Now we like them even more than the Swaddlers. Bonus: They're a fraction of the cost of Swaddlers and just as cheap or cheaper than other brands I've looked at (even Target-brand diapers, which often get good reviews), and shipping is free with a purchase of at least $35 -- easy to do when you're going through upwards of 50 diapers a week.

Now stop laughing, all you moms!

It's second nature now, but it sure wasn't at the beginning. Maybe I was especially green behind the ears since before Edith I had changed only one or two diapers my entire life -- and that was one or two more than Paul.

With shrinking families as well as relatives spread out across the country or around the world, however, I suspect many new parents are in the same position I found myself in. Is it rude to tuck a diaper tip sheet into a baby shower gift? I don't know, but it would've come in handy.